


Healing

by Juli



Category: The Losers - All Media Types
Genre: Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-07
Updated: 2015-03-07
Packaged: 2018-03-16 17:13:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,497
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3496343
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Juli/pseuds/Juli
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The thing about Jensen was that he complained loudly about lesser hurts, but Cougar had found that the worse he was in pain, the quieter and more withdrawn that Jensen got</p>
            </blockquote>





	Healing

**Author's Note:**

> Originally posted December 2010

“Make it stop.”

Cougar finished pouring hot water into a mug before he looked up at Roque. The big man was leaning against the wall. He had a scowl on his face, but Cougar knew his teammate well enough to see the concern underneath the expression. Not much for words, Cougar just lifted one eyebrow, silently asking Roque to explain his comment.

“The kid,” Roque’s scowl deepened. “Ain’t natural for him to be so quiet for so long.”

Pooch and Clay were sitting at the kitchen table, eating breakfast. They both were listening to the conversation and after Roque’s second comment, Pooch huffed softly in laughter.

“You’re usually complaining about how loud Jensen is,” Pooch pointed out. “And now you’re complaining that he’s too quiet? Make up your mind.”

“Roque’s got a point,” Clay stated. “The med team released Jensen to private quarters three days ago, but he’s hardly been out of his room and when he is, he’s not. . . Jensen. Do we have a problem, Cougar?”

Cougar shrugged. When you were a member of a team like the Losers, getting hurt was part of the job description. Minor wounds were common and they’d all learned to play through them, finishing whatever mission they were on despite the pain. The last mission had been different, though. Jensen had taken a gut wound and, to make it worse, they were in a remote location. Cougar had been sure he’d be burying his lover, but the medical team had worked a miracle. A week later, Jensen had been flown home on a transport plane, where he’d recovered another couple of more days in a stateside hospital. 

The thing about Jensen was that he complained loudly about lesser hurts, but Cougar had found that the worse he was in pain, the quieter and more withdrawn that Jensen got. He wasn’t surprised that the younger man had reacted to his latest injury by turning inward. Jensen had almost died. That would affect anyone, but especially a young man who Cougar knew was a lot deeper than his typical behavior would indicate.

The rest of the team didn’t know how to take it. In their own way, the team was protective of one another and more so for Jensen, who was the youngest and their tech to boot. Jensen could more than hold his own in a fight, but with his glasses and immature behavior, the others tended to look at him and treat him as an annoying younger brother. Jensen’s current silence was eerie to them and cause for concern.

“Jake will be all right,” Cougar responded to Clay’s question. “Tienes mi palabra.”

Cougar added the tea to the tray he’d made up and picked it up, heading towards the bedroom that he and Jensen shared. He’d left the door ajar on purpose, knowing his hands would be full when he came back. The room was still dark, but was sparsely furnished and Cougar had no trouble navigating his way to the dresser. He put his tray down and backtracked to close the bedroom door before perching on the edge of the mattress.

Jensen was on his side, curled up as much as a man of his size could. It was a big contrast to his normal position for sleeping, which was to spread out over as much of the mattress, and whomever else was on it, as possible. Despite the appearance, Cougar knew that his lover wasn’t asleep and reached out to run his fingers through Jensen’s unruly hair.

“Despierte, mi amor,” he said softly as he carded his lover’s hair, allowing Jensen to keep his pretence about sleeping. “You need to eat.”

“Not hungry,” Jensen didn’t open his eyes, but neither did he move away from the caress. 

Cougar sighed; they’d had this conversation before. He didn’t reply directly, though. He just stood and walked to the window. He opened the draperies, allowing the morning light in. It was a party cloudy day, so the sunlight wasn’t too bright. Even so, Jensen threw an arm across his eyes.

“Hey,” he protested weakly.

“You need to eat,” Cougar repeated firmly. Despite Jensen’s complaints, he helped the younger man sit and then propped him up with pillows.

Once Jensen was upright, however unwillingly, Cougar brought the tray over and set it on Jensen’s lap. “Look, amante, it isn’t much.”

Since Jensen hadn’t hardly been eating, Cougar had kept the breakfast to light fare. On the tray was one piece of unbuttered toast; a hardboiled egg; the tea; and to sweeten the deal, a cookie.

“Cougs, it’s just not happening,” Jensen didn’t have his glasses on and his eyes were bluer than normal.

“Just try,” Cougar tapped the plate. “For me.”

Jensen groaned, but picked up the cookie. Cougar stifled a smile; he had feeling that would be his lover’s first choice. Jensen’s initial bite was clearly reluctant, but once he got started, he ate the cookie quickly. Without commenting, Cougar handed him the tea. Jensen took a gulp and the polished off the egg and toast. He was finished in a matter of moments and looked at the tray in disbelief.

“I was hungry?” 

“Si,” Cougar confirmed. “And you stink.”

“I do not-. . . .” Jensen lifted his arm a little and took a whiff. “Yeah, I guess I do.”

“Bathroom, amante,” Cougar pulled the covers back from Jensen’s legs. “I’ll help.”

Cougar wrapped an arm around the younger man and helped him swing his legs around. Jensen hissed in pain as Cougar got him to his feet and Cougar responded by holding him upright. Jensen grabbed on to his elbows as Cougar steadied him, nodding a few minutes later to indicate his readiness to continue.

“Go,” Cougar released him and turned him towards the attached bathroom. “I’ll be right there.”

It only took a moment for Cougar to straighten the sheets on the bed. After that, he grabbed something clean for Jensen to wear, including a new t-shirt he’d been waiting to give the younger man, and located Jensen's glasses. When he was done, he joined his lover in the bathroom. Jensen was sitting on the closed toilet lid. His face had a little more color in it; getting up was good for him.

Jensen was content to sit and let Cougar turn the water on; Cougar knew exactly what water temperature that the other man preferred. While it was warming up, Cougar helped Jensen off with his clothes and then gave him an arm to steady himself while he climbed into the shower. Cougar silently stripped and joined him. It was a tight fit for two men, but they’d navigated smaller showers successfully in the past.

For a moment, Cougar was content to wrap his arms around Jensen and merely lean his forehead between the younger man’s shoulder blades, letting the warmth of the water and the scent of his lover calm his nerves. Jensen’s hands came up to cover Cougar’s where they rested high on his belly, avoiding the still-tender site of the bullet wound.

Cougar could have stayed like that forever, but Jensen didn’t have the stamina for more than a few minutes. When he felt the body he was holding start to shake, Cougar reluctantly let go. He reached for the soap and lathered it up. Not wanting anything to come between his skin and Jensen’s, Cougar didn’t use a washcloth. Instead, he ran his hands gently across his lover’s skin and then just as carefully sluiced the suds off.

By the time Jensen really started to shake, Cougar had finished cleaning him. He left the water running and climbed out of the shower, immediately turning to offer Jensen some assistance. Cougar hastily put a folded towel on top of the toilet lid and then encouraged Jensen to sit. Silently, Jensen obeyed. That coupled with the wounded man’s refusal to look at him, set off alarms in Cougar’s head. He made short work of turning the shower off so he could focus on what was important.

“Jake?” Cougar asked softly, squatting in front of Jensen. He was dripping all over the bathroom rug, but didn’t care. “What’s wrong? Are you in pain?”

Jensen shook his head, causing water droplets to fly everywhere. He bit his lip, but refused to answer.

Sighing, Cougar reached for another towel. He, of all people, understood the disinclination to talk and it felt hypocritical for him to try and force Jensen to speak. On the other hand, what was right for Cougar wasn’t necessarily right for Jensen.

“When you were shot, I was afraid,” Cougar started toweling Jensen off. If his lover wouldn’t talk, he decided, then he would. “Do you remember, amante? I begged you to stay with me and you did.”

Jensen nodded, but didn’t say anything.

“The others, they were frightened as well, although they hid it better,” Cougar continued. “Given where the wound was, you couldn’t be thrown over the shoulder, so Roque carried you to the extraction spot. When we arrived, Pooch threw the helicopter pilot out of his seat and flew the chopper himself.” Now that the danger was well past, Cougar allowed himself a small smirk. “You are lucky if you don’t remember that flight, amante. Even the other pilot was green by the time we landed. Pooch was flying wild, but the time he shaved off the trip may have saved your life.”

“I remember crying,” Jensen whispered. “And pleading with Clay not to press down so hard.”

Cougar stopped his ministrations with the towel and put his fingers under Jensen’s chin, forcing the other man to look at him. “There’s no shame in that, Jake. You were badly hurt; the Colonel understood.”

As far as Cougar was concerned, Jensen would never learn about how Clay had looked at his bloody hands after the medics had taken over and then went over to a corner and vomited until his bile was tinged with blood.

Jensen’s voice cracked. “I almost died, Cougar.”

“Yes,” Cougar admitted. “But you didn’t, Jake. You’re here with me now, alive, and I am very grateful.”

Cougar didn’t begrudge Jensen his delayed reaction. The younger man was tough and had been in life or death situations several times, but had never come so close to actually dying before. 

“What if, what if I can’t make it back?” Jensen asked. “What if I can’t be on the team anymore?”

It wasn’t a matter of the physical; Jensen would heal. What the younger man was talking about was the mental. Cougar knew his lover and knew how strong Jensen was. He never doubted that Jensen could go on dangerous missions again and handle the pressure. Jensen, however, needed to discover for himself that he still had that courage.

“If you can’t, then we will go on without you,” Cougar told him. “But I will still love you and be happy in the knowledge that you will be waiting for me in safety when I come back.”

His words had an immediate affect. Jensen’s head shot up and his eyes narrowed. “The hell you will. I’m a Loser and you won’t leave me behind.”

Cougar’s smirk grew into a genuine grin. “If you say so, amante.”

“I say so,” Jensen replied firmly. “Now give me that towel.”

Without another word, Cougar handed over the towel and stepped back. He grabbed one of his own and quickly dried off, while Jensen finished more slowly. By the time Jensen was done, in fact, Cougar was finished and completely dressed.

Expressionlessly, Cougar handed Jensen his glasses and then a pair of faded navy sweatpants. Jensen put his feet through the proper holes and then, with Cougar’s help, stood. He’d lost enough weight that the sweats, never tight, hung loosely on his hips.

Cougar next gave Jensen the new shirt, which was a soft shade of yellow. Jensen’s eyebrow went up as he realized it was one he hadn’t seen it before. He unfolded it and started to chuckle. “Nice.”

The shirt had a drawing of a fluffy white kitten on it. The kitten’s expression was sweet and its big eyes practically dripped of innocence. The kitten figure was framed above by a rainbow and below by fluffy white clouds. On it, written in a delicate script, was the phrase “The voices are telling me to kill you.”

Lifting his arms was a cause of pain for Jensen, so Cougar helped him don the shirt. When it was on, Jensen shyly kissed Cougar. “Thanks, Cougs.”

“De nada,” Cougar murmured as he stroked Jensen’s shoulder through the soft fabric of the shirt.

“Not for this,” Jensen gestured at the t-shirt. “For this,” he leaned into Cougar’s arms, availing himself of the comfort to be found there.

“Somos uno,” Cougar murmured gently. “When you hurt, I hurt.”

The two men stood intertwined. Cougar felt like he could stay that way forever, but he knew that was impossible. After a few minutes, he stepped back and took Jensen’s hand. “Come.”

Cougar guided Jensen out of the bathroom and past the bed. He went right for the hallway, although at a slow enough pace that Jensen could easily follow. Jensen’s eyebrows went up as he realized that Cougar wasn’t going to let him hide in the bedroom anymore, but he didn’t protest.

They found the other Losers in the living room. By some unspoken mutual consent, the couch had been left unused ever since they returned to their off-base quarters, as though reserving it for Jensen. Roque, Clay and Pooch were at the table, playing cards. To Cougar’s relief, they didn’t comment on Jensen joining them, but simply nodded a simple greeting.

Cougar got Jensen seated on the couch and handed him the television remote before settling in behind him. Cougar encouraged Jensen to lie back against him and soon the two of them were stretched out comfortably, Cougar running his fingers through Jensen’s hair as the other man surfed through the cable channels.

“Wow, Syfy is showing ‘Aztec Rex,’” Jensen crowed as he finally stopped on a channel. “You’ll love this one, Cougar. The Aztecs summoned a dinosaur to stop Cortez, but then it started munching on the natives.”

Roque snorted loudly. “Your taste in movies is as bad as your taste in shirts.”

“At least in the movies I watch, the actors kept their clothes on,” Jensen retorted. He winced when a scantily clad Aztec crossed the screen. “Mostly.”

“And they do have dialog other than ‘faster, harder,’” Pooch chimed in.

“Are you guys gonna ante up or not,” Clay growled. He was pretending to be focused on his cards, but Cougar could see that the worry lines around Clay’s eyes had relaxed some; their leader was glad to have Jensen back with them too.

Cougar gratefully let the banter wash over him. Jensen was on the mend. He sent a silent prayer of thanks and pulled Jensen closer. For the moment, it was good to be a Loser.

~the end~


End file.
